princessofnazareth:

there’s. stimulant shortage because KAMALA won’t stop snorting them and feeding them to joe wrapped in little bits of american cheese slice

reallyreallyreallytrying:

when the swiss are done hogging the large hadron collider i also have some important experiments to run

eloves-off:

animentality:

gayestpiano:

plesiosaurchestra:

sjweminem:

radiofreederry:

she sauce on my scrod till i’m a New Man

EXTREMELY LOUD INCORRECT BUZZER

gjjuddmk2:

onion-souls:

thepleasuregoblin:

is that what your parents told you when you woke up and your pet elf was gone

Elves conveniently feel the pull to the Undying Isles when the human adventurer they shacked up with hits their 50s and the half-elves are heading to college

gothycollie:

🔥 Korfball🌍

mosticonicposts:

chuckecheeses:

rodnt:

sigh…i came all the way to sephora but i don’t know which brands are asexual friendly….i have to hurry jugheads birthday is today…wish someone would help me out

Hi Sister Archie! James Charles here, might I suggest Too Faced Better Than Sex Mascara?

certified iconic post

unescoworldheritagepussy:

aaays-and-bees:

unescoworldheritagepussy:

‘horseplay’ and 'monkey business’ being treated as synonyms means something. don’t know what though

Monkeys are so silly that what they consider business, horses consider play.

ALT

milk5:

charlesoberonn:

Aliko Dangote, the richest man in Africa, has been tormented by a Brazilian man named Osvaldo for the last several years.

coughloop:

coughloop:

she took the ladders in the divorce

can someone help me get down